Asking "Why?"

It's amazing how God spoke to me through prayer meeting today.

As the word of God came out from one of people who went out... I can't remember who it was... Mentioning a vision... seeing someone whom looks blurish.... and asking the question, "why?".

For a moment, that brought me back to my recent MSN nick: Why?

The word of God was brought to me... have I been looking to the left or to the right for direction? Have I been looking to created things instead of the creator? Have I been clinging on to His blessings, or clinging on to Him?

Lately my prayer have been to know how to love God more. How to truly love God... I'm thankful God is guiding me, and I can see in my path. It's like going back to basics with God, and I believe many believers have to always go through this to check their hearts... do they? I'm not sure, for I'm a pretty new believer.

After Oceania Convention, I was gonna go back to basics with God. And today, God was leading me to another door, I feel. This lesson is an exciting lesson from God. Though it may break my heart totally but if God will truly help me love Him more, and help me grow in faith, it is all worth it.

Break my heart for what breaks yours.
Open up my eyes to the things unseen.
Everything I am for Your Kingdom's cause.

Being obedient to God's guiding have saved me heaps of suffering. That day I made a prayer to God to take away my tears, to comfort me. And in the next minute, I received a task to do, a task I knew God wanted me to do, but my heart didn't.

That moment, I asked God, "Are you sure God... You want me to do this. You know all my tears will flow out even more..."

And God said, "Obey me."

Obey You God? I thought for a moment.

"I will do what you said God. For it is always better to be in your ways than mine."

So I went ahead and did what I was instructed to. The moment the task was accomplished, I was comforted by God immediately. Instead of tears rolling down, I felt a sense of relieve, as though God had taken away a burden from me. That made me realise the importance of obeying God. There's all I think I can do for God. But what does God truly seek from me? Isn't it just a heart of obedience?

But Samuel replied: "Does the Lord delight in burnt offerings and sacrifices as much as in obeying the voice of the Lord? To obey is better than sacrifice, and to heed is better than the fat of rams." -- 1 Samuel 15:22 (NIV)

So many times we know all these scriptures, and we know it's meaning. Yet we do not fully comprehend the essence till God teaches it to us personally. Yet each time we learn a lesson, we may lose it in our memory bank, till God reteaches us the lesson.

But the Grace of God is upon us for what Jesus did for us, and God, being merciful and gracious chooses to forgive us time after time when we repent. What more can we ask for, but to be in God's hands always?

".... Let us fall into the hands of the Lord, for his mercy is great; but do not let me fall into the hands of men." -- 2 Samuel 24:14 (NIV)

In His hands and way we may seem aliens. Like Pastor Lance mentioned. Yet, we are no longer people who lead a mundane life, because we have been given our new lives from God. We are a new creation. Will you choose this day, to be a pleaser of worldly methods or an alien to the world - a child of God?

"Hear my prayer, O Lord, listen to my cry for help; be not deaf to my weeping. For I dwell with you as an alien, a stranger, as all my fathers were." -- Psalm 39:12 (NIV)

This day, I've learnt once again, that to obey is better than sacrifice. And although things may not be the way we want it, God knows what it best for us. He will never fail us, for He knows us more than we know ourselves. In His hands may we find refuge eternally.

Amen.