Monday, December 31, 2012

Good bye 2012

I'm about to say bye bye to 2012.

Some people love promises. Some people fear and shun them. This year has been a year of promises. And for a few years I always looked forward to the year 2012. I enjoyed it thoroughly, through the ups and downs... and kinda unwilling to part with it too.


I'm here in Singapore, maybe just so I can buy another 2 hours of the year before I really say goodbye. The TV program right in front of me is showing many interviews of people and how their years have been going.

I don't know what awaits me next year. 2012 has been a comfortable year, maybe not totally. There was a season of growing into bigger shoes... yet in the next year I feel there is a push to step out of my comfort zone, even more. There has been new things... and there has been old things that left. There has been joys, and there has been sorrow. Breakthroughs in friendships and ministry... and even at work. But I'm still hoping for more.

In the last month or two, I've been seeking God for some direction in the new year. I'll share them in my new year's entry... :)

Now to say good bye with a smile... I pray you, who are reading this, will also run stronger for God in the coming year... it will certainly be my joy.

2009 - I learned to persevere and rejoice in suffering.
2010 - I battled pride and learned humility. Many breakthroughs.
2011 - I journeyed with God through a year of Faith.
2012 - I held on with faith, embarking on a ride to claim His promises.

2013 seems some what like a sequel to come. I'm so not prepared. But I know God thinks I'm ready.... so, bring it on 2013. More promises, more breakthroughs... plus the harvest for Him.

Alright, I can't blog anymore. Am pretty distracted with the King Kong movie on TV.

I will miss you 2012.... 


Maybe because an expected turn of unexpected events occurred, maybe for the better.

Thursday, December 27, 2012

Promises... + Philippines Mission Trip

Today, I finally submitted my application.. After... 4 years... :)

The wick of the 2012 candle is almost reaching it's end. The promises of the Lord are still inching their ways into my life.

I've just returned from an eye opening and heart moving Mission Exposure Trip to the Philippines, partnering with the Ambassadors For Jesus Christ (AFJC), which Alvin and Jace started about two years back.

This trip has taught me a lot. It has opened my eyes and mind, and moved my heart to a new dimension of faith, and I'm even more convicted in doing the work the Lord has called me and spoken about of me during my presbytery. The people of God needs to see what God is doing out there, and fan aflame their passion and commitment to the Kingdom of God... :)

I would write more, but maybe not today....

Tonight, I sat before my decommissioned laptop. It has been through a lot this year... but it still works. Now, I've decided to leave it here.. maybe. For some reason, I felt led to read through my blog entries from the beginning of this year. I looked at the ups and downs I've been through, and an emotional season as well... the unfolding of God's plans has brought many "whaos" to my mind, and what seemed like darkness back then has now light shed upon them.

Hopefully, I will write another entry before the year ends.

But now I thought I'd just post some photos of my recent fun activities, so as to keep my failing mind reminded in the years and seasons to come.. of God's hand upon my life, His faithfulness.

Stem Cells Australia Retreat at the Barossa Valley. Thank you Lord for this blessed opportunity.. :)

After the retreat, I drove a rented Holden Cruze for the first time. It's a good car... will I buy it in future? Maybe... or maybe not.

I took Leslie along! And we had fun.. together. :)

A beautiful afternoon and evening spent with MiaoTiao4... 4, because 1 was away. :)

Philippines Mission Trip.. First Brekkie Together (Mark was still upstairs in the room)

It rained... and flooded on the first morning. :(

Mini Ice Cream... so cute! Can be eating all at one go.. 5 of them.

Shopping to feed families at the slums...


Team work! More stuff!
Hello Kitty car.. haha...

Manolo Slum Feeding...

Giving thanks to God for the food.

Missionary Training for us, taught by Kuya Alvin. :P

Night time crusade ticket distribution at Malanday Dump Site slum..

Ministering at the Children's ward at Philippines Orthopedic Hospital. Many received Christ.

Dinner at a floating restaurant on a lake... man-made lake?

Preparation for Music Festival Crusade at Malanday Dump Site... Many came, many responded at the altar call for accepting Christ... :) Praise God.

A jeep terminal. This building seems like a partially demolished shopping centre... it looks beautiful though.

The most common transport we've seen, the Jeep!

ok... now for the good/bad news. I balut-ed. I did... :(

Shannen all excited. Seya all unwilling... and me, facial expressions masking what I was really feeling within. Ewww... *green face*

A picture tells a thousand words... :)
More photos and stories next time.. I'm not sure how I'm going to storyline them... so, keep checking back.


Wednesday, December 12, 2012

Faithful Healer

A princess apologue.
An unclosed hurtful chapter that began 4 years ago.. Always trying to close it and make it well but nothing worked.

Eventually she decided to resolve it through the King, the only healer who had a great track record.

After her many tears and prayers, the King brought her matter to a conclusion. The opportunity was created and God healed.

She was totally unsure how it all happened. She eventually gave it up to the King more than a year ago... learning to find the forgiveness in Him, and leave the rest to the King.

If He willed, they would have an opportunity to talk about it one day. Maybe decades down the road. Maybe when they reunite with the King.... Maybe someday.

His miraculous divine timing finally brought reunion again and blessings to flow. Her King had added another of these escapades into His success track record.

An old chapter finally closed. A new one begins.


It's been a crazy two days with endless ups and downs. But she perseveres on, and learns to trust her King for the next apologue.

More promises to await fulfillment. :)

Wednesday, November 14, 2012

My Super Tough Jesus! :)

Now this is an interesting one. I intended to snuggle in bed for a bit, but ended up holding tight my iPhone - iSyndrome? Maybe... but I was having an inspiring conversation with a sister... and I'm surprised how God just helped us to piece a bit of His heart together.

Prologue

So it began with my heart feeling broken again... It always hurts and saddens me to see people choose a different route instead of walking into God's safe waiting embrace. It sounds most reasonable, if we choose to put it this way, that in the midst of pain and suffering, the most logical and reasonable path one should take, is into the loving, giving and comforting arms of our Saviour, our Lover, our Creator.

But why? Because we know and have experienced that He is the Alpha and Omega, and He works for the good of those who loves Him, and His Promises are Yes and Amen. And He promises so many good things to us... so why do people still choose to walk away?

Here's goes:

Nowadays, I think about all the people in my life. And I ask God what makes someone grow so much more. It is the heart. The heart to be so open to God and His ways. The obedience to do what God tells us to do, even though its not what we want. The humility to admit our weaknesses, not fight for pride 面子 or rights.

In times as such, our pride and ego, and inability to be weak or kind is really heart breaking. The mass majority choose to protect our hearts, but we're really only fragile within. A tough exterior for protection - but a broken hurt heart within.

It takes a lot of courage to open up, be bashed and smashed. But if we allow that to happen, then we realise that nothing worse can actually happen to us.

I've learned that if I want to love, I must be prepared to be hurt. If I want to serve, then serve without hoping for affirmation in return. I have to be prepared to be disappointed. It's true, but nobody wants to go down that path, especially if you get smashed repeatedly. It's not easy.... unless you go down that path with Lots of God.

Lots of God

Yes, "Lots of God". I mean, we need a lot of God. God to increase in our lives. Let God just move freely in our hearts and lives, can't we? Many are trying, but it's easier to walk away nowadays. Well, I'd say, take the hard way. I find it's worth it.

To me, the hard way may initially seem and feel difficult, but when all the hardship and afflictions doesn't matter to you anymore, that's when the surrendering comes in. We struggle less. We either hold on tight to what matters to us, or release ourselves into what may physically look difficult, but spiritually, we are set free in God's love.

But, we need to experience it, if not all these would just be Christian jargon!

Choose to Take His Hand

When we fall down, it's either we stay there, or take His hand and allow Him to guide us. Take His hands - we become vulnerable physically because it requires Faith and Trust. Or we can stay there, and use our own strength - protect ourselves, harden our hearts even more.


But that hardening filled with scars become very brittle and nobody can see that. Friends, let's release our hearts to God... I believe He will heal all the hurts inflicted by this world. More so, God will fill our hearts with His love.

Bleeding Love

The song that comes to my mind is "Bleeding Love" from Leona Lewis. This song was written by Ryan Tedder, a Christian worship leader. He wrote this song talking about God's love for him.. (but of course the MTV here has been made secular..)



Let me share some parts of the lyrics with you:

"...You cut me open and I keep bleeding, keep keep bleeding love.."

Don't harden our hearts, let us be cut, but because we've already been touched and filled with God's love, each time we're cut open, we can only bleed love. Only love can flow out.

"...My heart's crippled by the vein that I keep on closing..."

Don't close up the heart, nor the vein. Each time you close up a part of you, you're crippled. Our hearts get crippled. Close the vein - we become crippled.

There are many challenges in the world now and it's easy to be cut. It's hard to stand tough! In the naked eye of the world, we may all seem like 'softies' Christians.

Not Soft But Tough!

But let me tell you something. We may look soft, easy targets for bullying - but I'd say we're not. My colleague said I was 'stupid' because I chose to follow God's ways. But I know God is good and let me share with you Psalm 37.

Do not fret because of those who are evil
    or be envious of those who do wrong;
for like the grass they will soon wither,
    like green plants they will soon die away.
Trust in the Lord and do good;
    dwell in the land and enjoy safe pasture.
Take delight in the Lord,
    and he will give you the desires of your heart.
Commit your way to the Lord;
    trust in him and he will do this:
He will make your righteous reward shine like the dawn,
    your vindication like the noonday sun.
Be still before the Lord
    and wait patiently for him;
do not fret when people succeed in their ways,
    when they carry out their wicked schemes.
Refrain from anger and turn from wrath;
    do not fret—it leads only to evil.
For those who are evil will be destroyed,
    but those who hope in the Lord will inherit the land.
10 A little while, and the wicked will be no more;
    though you look for them, they will not be found.
11 But the meek will inherit the land
    and enjoy peace and prosperity.
- Psalm 37:1-11 (NIV)

Christians who live by God's ways are not softies. Allowing ourselves to reach a state of vulnerability because of His love, makes us 'soft but tough'. A different kind of softness.

I think Jesus was tough! My Jesus was and is my Super Tough SuperHero! In His toughness, He chose to become soft for the world to be saved. Well, my friend said that 'soft people can't go through what Jesus went through'.

Jesus is strong. Let our understanding of true strength this day be revolutionized.

My prayer this day is for all to thrive within the embrace of God's love. It takes courage to become weak, to give up our rights, to give up our pride.. to courageous love.

Loving a neighbour, or a person in your heart... or your colleague, or your enemy... your family.. it all takes courage. Doing something for another person... you might not receive the kind of response you want, but the moment you decide to show an act of love, because you love them, do it without hoping for something in return.

I've learned to be honest with my heart. To love boldly. I don't want to look back many years later and regret not loving because of pride or fear of showing my vulnerability.

One thing I know for sure, is that God's got my vulnerability back up, so has He got yours too.

Epilogue

If you struggle to walk with God, or struggle to have a stronger faith to trust in His best ways for you... then there might be something you are holding on to so tightly that you're afraid of losing. Once you let go of that and ask for God's best for you, what is BEST for you will definitely be placed into your hands. No doubt.

He created us from the beginning, so He knows us best.

I'm still learning this - embracing this process of being open to God, yet in my imperfections walking in His Grace.

Alright... time to say a prayer... and thank my superhero tough tough Jesus! :)

Monday, November 12, 2012

Almost there...

I have quite a bit going on lately. Many thanks to my awesome God, the Provider of my life. For the past 4 years, the door seemed closed. I've prayed over and over... and I know that one day it would open.

The door has opened... but there are barriers, and obstacles. There are battles I have to fight. I'm praying and praying and fighting so much. This battle will be won, with God.

A bit low on finances lately... It's a good problem. Since the door has finally opened. On one hand, I'm having to be on a tight budget... on the other hand.. I have no complains for what the Lord has done for me. But I'mma keep praying the finances come in... :)

Time is not my best friend now... but my friends have been so encouraging. If God began something, He would call it to completion. Last stretch for this chapter... keep persevering!

It seems like the final stretch is the hardest run...But there's the promise that awaits.


What's this feeling again that returns...?

Maybe it's time to be stripped bare for prayer.


Her heart cries from deep within. Tearing it all apart. No, she wants to just tear it all apart. An unheard roar. Maybe a silent moo. E...mo.

Need provision... The Lord will Provide. Jehovah Jireh.

Two things. Many thoughts... and then the other thing... beyond the expression of words. The funny things that all occur at once. Friends laugh together with me at the irony of things... or what a friend called 'Prime Season'.

Yet in this season, it seemed like the preparations have been laid many years ago. Not shaken. Still sure and certain of what is right.

Alright, off for now. Write more next time.

这是她和他之间的记忆
也是他们的故事
你别来破坏好吗?
走开。。

这春天引来了太多    可是这朵花     仍然只为他开着

Friday, November 9, 2012

Post birthday update... randoms!

So I'm supposed to be sleeping right now. But after tossing in bed for an hour and not achieving anything, I should accredit this restlessness once again to the award winning Hong Kong Milk Tea from Cybercity.

Needless to mention, I have obviously been cutting slack on my entries lately. Since my last emo filled update, what's been going on?

Much I believe.

How about allowing the photos to do the job?

The Surprise That Caught Me

May I start off with what happened shortly after my return from home.. Not too long ago, I received a parcel at work that was massive. It showed up too massive to enter my little pigeon hole, and thus was placed at the top of the shelves.

I then opened it to realise it was an expensive, exquisite piece of toy... A Nespresso machine! O-M-G!
(Allow the image below to tell the rest of the story.)



In the words of Yvonne, I'm not the easiest person to be caught unaware or in surprise. But this gift did me. Beyond that, it took me a few days to comprehend at the heart behind it... And a series of interrogation before I could accept the gift thankfully and cheerfully. Thank you everyone who made this possible. I'm not the best gift giver/chooser and I may never be able to surprise or give any good gifts, but allow me to bless you in return through the other love languages. Hehe.

Next, I had an awesome birthday road trip. Oysters, friends and hiking. Once again I've had the privilege of eating oysters on my birthday. I think this trend only started two years ago, and amazingly followed through to this year. Last year, I had oysters with mum in Tassie! Hee hee!



Farewell Peter

Another closing chapter of a Brissie mate. It's been a long hard journey for my homeboy Peter but I'm glad he made it through to the completion of his PhD. Now he's back home with his family and hopefully drawing closer to God daily.
Cheers to friendship!



Alright, all the photos... And I'mma go get some eye shut. Hopefully it works this time. No milk tea lesson, still never learned. :)

Random Photos

I really like this photo. Feels kind of a sub-olympic senic, yet race.. I don't know! lol~

Cheers to Miaotiao Friendship too.. :)

Friday, October 12, 2012

没有如果 + 真实 MV songs... hehe

The song that's lately in our morning tea conversations.. :)



Thank God for all the friends He's put into my life.
Although at times I feel like I can't handle them all... tsk tsk.

But God's grace has enabled me to do much.
To be a blessing... and to be blessed by many friends.

Friends... such a necessity... sometimes a pain.. oops.

I might be the pain to someone too.

Everyone's given a different cup to drink. A different car to drive.
A different path to walk. A different gift to use.
I'm still figuring out mine... and how to use it well.

Time to stop the emo-ness, and go to bed... yep.

有人說 世界上最遙遠的距離不是 生與死 而是 我就站在你面前 你卻不知道我 愛你

短暂的幸福不值得去争取...
眼泪,就让它流吧...
今天的五滴泪, 总会比将来的心痛好...

Ah.... reminds me of another emo song... hehe.


心痛比快樂更真實 愛為何這樣的諷刺 我忘了這是第幾次 一見你就無法堅持 孤獨比擁抱更真實 愛讓人失去了理智 會不會是我太自私 拒絕更寂寞的日子 放不開 也看不見未來


These emo songs are not what I'm fully advocating in my heart.. just in case you're wondering. Hehe... 

God above all my emo-ness... He's got the best for me. :)

Tuesday, October 9, 2012

Da Jie wedding... trip back home. :)

I'm back in Brisbane! Mixed feelings once again. Was looking forward to getting back at work, knowing the tons of experiments awaiting me. Yet at the same time kinda reluctant to return to a life 'all by myself' again....

Was a well packed trip I had. 姐姐嫁人了!

Morning Preparations.. before the Gatecrash!

Gatecrashing... :)
 
Hee... Happily married! :)

Celebrated Mum's birthday...

Decided to cook up a meal for Mum! Everything cooked by me, except the cake. Haha..

Pre- and Belated Birthday celebration for Bro, Sis, Mum and myself at 黑社会 restaurant.
Surprise visit to my relatives in Muar... Was thankful to be around to visit my unwell aunt in Meleka hospital too... Thank God for speedy recovery... and also very blessed to visit my other aunt who missed me so much....

Few of the places where many of my relatives work... :)

At the Coconut Garden hawker centre.

Mum's side of family. Aunt was so happy to see me she cried...

More food!!

and... more....

Breakfast at Muar Town!

Got my Singaporean driving license.... no photos of course.


Caught up with some buddies... and crazy ones.

Tea catch up with the invisible Eliza... can you see her... hand?

Another Tea catch up with the crazy as ever Andrea... oo, we grew up?

The wanAtutu ppl... a few of them, all moving up in life stages...

And... not to forget the Wushu guys... oh, and MEI LI MAO~~

Jammed packed well spent trip...
Played PS3 Final Fantasy 13 in my spare time..... shopping... sleep... laze with family.. oh, not really that much free time though. Hehehe..

Alrighty, time to sleep now. :)